Blog closed..

He's still breathing! MEDIICCC!!!!

If you write in perfect English, people call you Mr England King..

If you write in casual colloquial English, people say you cannot write at all..

If you blog regularly, people say you have no life..

If you don't blog regularly, people say you're running out of ideas..

If you have ads on your blog, people say you're selling out..

If you don't have ads on your blog, people call you STUPID DUMBASS for not trying to make easy money..

If you leave your comments and site address on other blogs, people will say you're site-whoring..........


I remember mulling over this dilemma, contemplating whether or not should I close my blog for good. But I've made my decision a long time ago. That blogging is meaningful for me to keep track of my life in this superb fast pace. As my testimony, as my timekeeper, as my self-checklist.

Apart from that, blogging is fun! I've enjoyed myself writing all these entries and since day one, I've never write an aimless entry or an unpremeditated entry. Some might turn out to be a lil beat around the bush but the whole idea here is that; I believe every word counts and everything mirrors who I am as a blogger. Whether I'm one of those who cramp bimbo photos all over the page, those who blog once in a blue moon or those who plainly write crap.

When I first start akulahalfi, I told myself that I'm gonna tell the world about my daily happenings. But unlike other bloggers out there who naively write about what happen in their whole entire day, I see akulahalfi different.

I wanna tell the world of what I think is happening around me. My thoughts, my retrospection, my viewpoint; all behind a small cranium of a 16 years old. And yeah, after updating akulahalfi for a year plus now, I think I'm sailing with the wind. Well, excuse some drifts when I slant a lil bit on my personal self but other than that, I think I've achieve everything an amateur blogger can do.

The Swine Flu outbreak, The Beijing Olympics, The Haunted House, or even my complain letter to the principal, everything just falls into place and I feel that akulahalfi had successfully effectuate its content upon its readers.

AndAND, I don't know until someone told me. But it occured that many akulahalfi's reader doesn't seem to fall on the same page as I do when it comes to the language department. Hahaha.. Well, what can I say? I'm not really into cheem English but rather, I'm conscientious when it comes to speak/write proper English.

But ultimately, there are even more important things out there than writing all those verbose post. Which is why I tell myself that,

"It's time to change.."

It's time that I make amends and change my style of blogging, its time to reconstruct and innovate.  Which is why today.......

I announce that I wash my hands off akulahalfi and relocate it to akulahalfi-history..

Well, akulahalfi will still breathe on. Its just that those entries from day one till today's will be moved to a new site. And akulahalfi will have fresher entries! :) Cause I don't wanna delete them as there's too much sweet memories in there.

So a big thank you to everyone who has supported and has stayed faithful to akulahalfi throughout the years. I'll see y'all very soon, with an alpha beginning...

"Eh sial, today we got exam sial."

I love texts just waiting in my inbox when I wake up in the morning.

And today, its from Hafiz.

So much for spoiling a beautiful Sunday reminding me that we'll be having Arabic exam. Oh well.

I think.. This is gonna suck but I think I am breaking apart.

Finally I am losing this battle of determination I always had with me. Things start happening all wrongly. I got sick just yesterday. I deproved alot in... what? Soccer? I looked at Linux script blankly and desperately ask for help. Only silently.

Everything is piling up over me, I can feel its intensity. Its pressure.. Its pressing against me deeper and harder everytime as every second ticked by. There are times when I would feel so free, then the next day so screwed up with the amount of work lumped over me.

I remembered last time how things went on so smoothly and slowly in primary school days. When I dont have to worry much and life was so peaceful and happy. Those were the days but hey, isnt this all bout life?

Things always get more and more difficult but still, we'll have to face it, we'll have to deal with it. Many times, alone..

No matter how many people wish me good luck and encourage me all the way, I know it all boils down to me and myself. They can bring me so far, only show me the door. But I have to do it myself.

Thank you guys, for giving me that start. I'll never give up.. I'll never fail you..

EH CLOWN! STAND UP AND FIGHT!!

Human dislike pain, human dislike suffering. They tend to avoid it whenever possible. But its interesting how every muscle in your body tells you to stop, and yet if your mind is clear and focused on what you want, your muscles will keep moving...

Polytechnic life started out smooth sailing. At first. The beginning was rocky. Choppy and inferior, raw and unpolished. Like river tributaries coming together to form a single stream, we gelled and blended into this dewy environment, oblivious to the background that we eventually be acclimated to.

But as the course continue down the ever-quest of reaching the final goal of sea, the energy of the river becomes much more. Going slow on the meanders, gaining momentum over the rapids and belatedly whiz into the plunge of the formidable waterfall. The inconsistent viscosity of river, the differential rate of life.

Yes. Life has gone so fast, there weren't much control. Except the natural gravitional pull. The pull towards a lower land where it's safe again, when the water's calmer.



Where I want to be...

Enough of my cognitive prologue, it occured to me that ever since the official start of Polytechnic, I've been living in oblivion. A cadaverous living under the shadow of sunlight. See how contradictory each word mean?

School has definitely kept me buried and/but sleepless in my tomb for many many nights. Twenty-four hours a day was never enough. There were days when I forgot why I did what I did, when I felt like I'm being left behind while pushing the rest of the world in front of me, when I feel poop out.

(Here are some of the stuff that I did. Click to enlarge)

Worse, then there were the days when all the labour showed repugnant results, when all the endeavours prove thwarted. This brings me to the question as to why we fight. Why do we fight? Why do we press on? Why do we persevere and endure? What makes us go that f%king extra mile? When we can settle for the ordinary, what makes us reach out for the extraordinary? Why do we want more, need more, taste more?



I believe we all fight for something. We fight because someone or something in our lives matter to us.



For me, right at this moment, I am fighting for my dreams. I am enduring this shitstorm so that one day I can reach my dreams. And why do I dream?

I dream because that is what my family wants me to do. They wish the best for me, so I wish the best for myself.

I fight for my grandparents, because they had painstakingly raised me up.

I fight for my friends, those that have stood by my side all these years.

I fight for those who stand true and who would readily give themselves up for others. I will stand by their side and fight with them.

I wonder what everyone else fights for. To all those who actually read this, and actually made it to the end of this long entry,

What do YOU fight for..??

Human dislike discomfort, human dislike change. Anything that forces them out of their comfort zone is a no go. And yet if they had only dared step out of their boundaries, they would have achieved so much more...

Eat your shit and flush yourself.

Remember in my last post I mention how I screwed up my first paper for my exam?

Apparently, the teacher inform us that there's ONE failure for that test. So being random, my classmates and I were guessing who's that miserable soul.

Alfie: I think I'm the one who'll fail that test.

Kian Hwee: Don't fake lahr...

Ben: What makes you think its you? I mean, I'm sure you did your revision.

Alfie: Yaa.. But I don't know. I think I screwed it up. I draw wrongly.

Ben: Okay let's bet.

Kian Hwee: Haha! Lets! :D

Alfie: Alright.

Ben: If you pass, you'll eat pork.

Me being me, I agreed cause I was SOO confirm plus chop that I'm SOO gonna fail the test.

I passed!

"F%k that Ben! I'm not gonna eat your pork. Ha.. Ha.." PWNED!

Well at least you've proven them you have brain!

The very first paper and I screw it all up. Damn! 

I just realise my whole paper antagonizes/contradicts the orignal question. The mother of all screw up: Qualifiers quantifiers. As always.

Whenever I do test or exam and somewhere in between I got stuck, I'll always think that there's something wrong with the question. Then I'll tweak that question to become MY question so that I can give an answer although its entirely out of line.

Like if they say, "Draw an apple."

And I'll monologue, "Hmm.. Red apple or green apple? Ah! I think its green."

And I end up drawing a pear.

Syabas.

Art is making something out of nothing and selling it

Ever since young, I've always wanted to fly. I've always wanted to fly all the way beyond the horizon and see how far I can touch the sky.

I love the sky. The way I see it, its always peppered with wisps of white strands of dragon's beard on a blanket of steely gray or azure blue, ebony black or golden yellow, earthen red or tawny copper. Its so beautiful. Every hue's a desultory of where you are and at what time of the day it is.

I fell in love..

I also remember asking myself, "If humans can fly, will we be wearing shoes?"

Perhaps, I'm one of the few miserable souls who Barneys that thought because Little Alfi hates wearing shoes! I don't know about you but I always find it cumbersome to be running 'round and playing catching encumbered to "chains" clasped on my feet. Especially when the laces came undone.

I was very stubborn and defiant towards the rule of thumb of walking on Earth, that there was once I step on a glowing cigarette butt and seared my feet while playing catching. It was until then that I realise the magnitude of wearing shoes.

Today, shoes are no longer just shoes. They had fashion fast-forward into a whole new level of appreciation towards artistic practicalities. Catch no balls?

Meet Tirmizi.

And my shoes designed by him.

Both me and Mizi had work hard together to achieve this by-product. Well of course Mizi worked hard(er) cause he's the one who did the painting. I'm just the mere "supervisor" since that's my shoes! Heehee..

But its nice to be back behind those pencils and colours again. The last artwork we did was the NDP 2008 Graffiti last year. Man, I miss those times.

Mizi and I are prolly the few minors who tailor art into fashion and demonstrate to the world that artistry should be meritted on par with couture. I mean, the way I see it, art has an intrinsic manner of expressing oneself. One's predilection. Like me, I guess Mizi also love the cloud and the skies. How'd I know?

See, that's the power of art. It makes you think like the artist. Fashion on the other hand is more like a trend. Once the trend erode, fashion becomes conventional.

I have a theory. That fashion always starts off beautiful but ends up ugly. But art, always starts off ugly but turns out to be beautiful. Which is why I remitted Mizi to mod my shoes with gloss and paint just to be anomalous from the others.

Above all, we are coming to an understanding that art incarnate the creativity of a free people. When the creative impulse cannot flourish, when it cannot freely select its methods and objects, when it is deprived of spontaneity, then society severs.

Find the art of your life. Find the colours that once mix so beautifully.